Happily ever after - the greatest myth of all

Recent events make me think that perhaps there is no such thing as a happy ending after all. The things I thought were writ in stone appear instead to wash away with the first rain. Things used to be so much simpler. The world was painted, if not in black and white, at least in different shades of grey. But when every choice looks the same and your compass is broken, which direction do you head in?

I wish for you and you that things had worked out differently, but knowing what I know, that would have been impossible, wouldn't it? It never would have, no matter how of us wished you well, no matter how much you both tried. Now I just hope you will both be okay in your separate lives.

A confession - I am glad that I'm not a lawyer any more so neither of you can ask me to finalize the end.

While I was in KL, Zee and I were talking over martinis before we went to a very tragically pretentious party and she said, "I don't know why everyone believes that it's a happily-ever-after. It's not. It's just more work".

At the very pretentious party (stuffed full of beautiful people air-kissing each other - yeah, that kind of party), I ran outdoors onto the balcony to escape the smoke that hurt my eyes, and to light up my own cigarette. Cap pulled low to hide my eyes, I dragged deep and exhaled and thought of magic and endings. And after a while someone with dark-lashed eyes and an ironic smile which may have worked on someone else comes up to me and says "This isn't a pick-up line, but I noticed you sitting here having so much fun" And I smile back and say, "Oh yeah, I'm having a blast" with my lying tongue, and laugh.


I met with InfernoXV yesterday, and we sat at Starbucks and watched "Dieux du Stade" on his laptop and ooed and aahed over French naked rugby players. And wondered how to score a job as the person oiling them down. And over tobacco, coffee and cigarettes, we talked about how people can hurt you. And how, sometimes, it's because you let them.

I need a day on the beach, with a martini in one hand, a smoke in the other, and my dog at my feet. Any takers?