"If the oxygen holds out, we might live long enough to starve to death."

Since I've been back, here's what I've been up to.

* I helped superglue plastic to a debrided tortoise shell. Note to Selleys - your superglue doesn't work on tortoises. 3M's Scotch tape does.

* I finally checked out the scandalous Edison Chen pictures. I blame this on Hachar, who bemoaned the fact that tha Hong Kong stars seemed incapable of trimming virgin forests. That, and Edison Chen's manhood, or lack thereof. "So small," he sniffed disparagingly holding his fingers about four inches apart.

* I got kicked in the back by a sheep. Right on a kidney, by the feel of it. I can actually see the hoofprint on my back. The fucking biatch who lost control of her fucking sheep during this week's practical just walked away and pretended nothing had happened. This is karma paying me back for the kidney shots I took at The Boy, I suspect.

* Manwhore told me that I had reminded him of a cartoon character, but for ages he couldn't remember who. Then he recalled it. "It's Leela!" he told me gleefully. Fot those who don't already know, she's a one-eyed purple-haired human sewer-mutant. That's hawt.

Oh, and I realized that I really, really miss you guys. And it's not even been two weeks.